Thursday, October 11, 2007

Welcome To News

Welcome to news. We begin this day's news by expressing deep condolences for those killed in today's terror attack. The Governments at both the state and central level have condemned it. So everything should be fine. We can be rest assured that Government will promptly do it's duty after any terrorist attack anywhere anytime. And that duty is to 'condemn' these attacks.

Apart from the attack, things are bright and cheerful and funny. Mahendra Singh Dhoni's daredevils lost quite convincingly in today's match against Australia. But he has already forgotten it. So no need to be disappointed at all. Before that, he admitted that the only thing that went right for him today was the toss.

And there is 'suspended animation' - the state of legislative assembly in Karnataka. 'Deft political maneuvers' are already underway, according to news reports, to form the next Government. 'Political pundits' feel that the new Government too would be a 'rag-tag coalition'.

Moving towards the west of the country we stop over at Gujarat. Here the 'ultimate battle of secularists against communal Hindutva forces' would be fought over the next two months. Defeat of 'communal forces', we are told by Rajdeep and Co, will also 'end the spell of hard Hindutva politics that had become rampant in the laboratory that Gujarat had become'. Had heard of physics lab, chemistry lab, biology lab and so on. This one's trendy - 'Hard hindutva politics lab'. But, ironically, doesn't suit the zeitgeist.

In New Delhi. Aadaraneeya Advaniji, has predicted that snap polls are now a certainty in the next six-eight months. Our leader of opposition has been saying this every few months since his 'communal' party lost that 2004 elections. Just for his credibility sake, he would be hoping that this time his prophecy comes true.

These days, our finance ministry gives out news hearing which we should feel good. And this feeling good, Mr FM is believed to think, should be made legally binding on citizens. He does not see any merits in objections to his erudite proposals, policies and projections. This week, his ministry comforted us that the inflation had gone down considerably. But, in a conspiracy by the opposition, people feel that prices of basic commodities are only going up. Not down.

We have no other news whatsoever. We do not believe in weather reports also. You need not have to keep watching this blog till I post my next post. You can engage yourself in other activities that might not contribute significantly to the gross domestic product. Good night.

2 comments:

Arjun said...

You seem to addicted to/obsessed with the term 'suspended animation' of late. This bodes well for the future of the Indian polity.

He he, true, Advani has been readying himself and the party cadres for 'snap polls' every six months since they lost. They don't tackle the real issues well and are left looking stupid when they do decide to take the government on about something.

I contribute significantly to the Gross Domestic Product.

Harish said...

´Suspended Animation´ ' Suits the zeitgeist. Now zeitgeist is another word I am obsesses with these days antaanoo heLbahudu. For that matter you can also be accused of this.

Aadarneeya Advaniji ´real issues´-na tackle maaDtilla antidya. Yaha apavaad khanDaneeya hai. This reminds us of emergency when opposition was condemned....

Ninage Bharat Ratna koDtaare.