Friday, September 29, 2006

No Magic, Only Pure Logic

As I have told time and again in this blog, many problems world over are nowhere near a solution mainly because of a complete lack of innovative thinking. Narrowing down the scope of the above statement, makes it applicable to the boundary dispute between Karnataka and Maharashtra that has been the central news-item over the past few days. It was complete lack of common sense, let alone innovative thinking, on the part of our leaders of the Nehruvian era that led to creation of states based on language. This has time and again raised many totally avoidable controversies between various states. "Belgaum Boundary Row" is the latest in that list. But all these controversies can be solved only if some creativity is invovled in the thought processes(if any) of our 'esteemed leaders'. As always I will give my solution despite the knowledge about the infinitely insignificant nature of this blog.

As is cliched, you need to get to the root of the problem to solve it. In this case it is the language. Only because people of that region speak either Marathi or Kannada , all these problems arise. So what if the people of Belgaum had spoken the Zulu language? Then they would have demanded that they be part of South Africa (where it is spoken). Since geography, which we can all agree is very cruel, wont allow that, this demand will be a non-starter(unless there is someone like the erstwhile Nizam of Hyderabad who wanted to join Pakistan sitting in the middle of India). But the problem is majority dont speak Zulu in Belgaum. Having identified this we move on to the next step.

Now people should learn Zulu, speak Zulu, write Zulu but be Indian in their hearts. But for people to learn Zulu they should be given incentives. We can give them money, land, forest, talktime, simcards, free television sets, free access to cable television that feature Rani Mukherji, Preity Zinta in peppy item numbers all day and has no programs that have anything to do with Rajdeep etc. Also we can have up and coming tennis players from Belgaum improve their rankings by making them play against Sania Mirza continuously. Sania will agree if she is monetarily rewarded well. We can also have some tax incentives(like zero tax on incomes between 0-1 billion, above it 0.97%) worked out provided they agree to speak Zulu and forget about any other language. If these were the conditions, I would have agreed to speak Zulu even in my sleep. This being the case, people would switch over to Zulu. No more border disputes. But Karnataka retains Belgaum by default. Maharashtra can also feel happy that these people do not have the previlege of watching their proud son Rajdeep. Win-win situation for both.

See, I told you no, idu tumba simple anta? What do you say?

13 comments:

Arjun Sharma said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Arjun Sharma said...

I do not like your snide allusions about Ms Mukherji. Nevertheless, sakkatagide ee solution-u!

Arjun Sharma said...

The Nizam's decision to join Pakistan, with his state stuck firmly in somewhat the centre of India remains one of the most laughable decisions. Aadre idea channagide!

Guru Anandh .R said...

" Rani Mukherji, Preity Zinta in peppy item numbers all day "...
" ...If these were the conditions, I would have agreed to speak Zulu even in my sleep...."

Nodi Naanu Harish Kalla andre Yaaru nambtha iraalilla .

Neway Good Bloggin harish !!

Harish said...

[Arjun] Ayyo, 'snide allusion' alvalla adu.
[Guru] Ee praanchadalli ellroo to an extent kaLLare.

tharunya said...

:)

And the added incentive lies in the fact that adults learning a new language will be so busy they won't have time for anything else...

P.S. I want to be able to comment in Kannada also. :( Someone teach me quick.

Harish said...

[Tharunya] Is keeping adults busy in learning a language an incentive? :)

swaroop said...

Life is like a border dispute. You being the border, people will fight over you, they fight on either side of the border and one fine day after a small reunion/war, the border is gone.
(P.S : If you reply to this, you are mad)

Arjun Sharma said...

"We can give them money, land, forest.."

Forest?? Ha ha!!

Tharunya, just add "Le moorkha!!" to the beginning and "Gottayteno, mutthala?" to the end of your comment. Takes care.

tharunya said...

See?
There is a God.
Much thanks, Arjun. Gottaytu. :)

Mahawiki said...

http://mahawiki.blogspot.com

hillarious!How is Nizam of Hyderabad related to belgaum?You are equating Maharashtra with Pakistan!!!
Now u know why Belgaum wants to be part of Maharashtra.
Kadhi sodavshil deva ya kannad rakshankaDun???

Harish said...

[mahawiki]First of all, let me make it clear that I do not understand Marathi.
Secondly, I am against going through the process of 'reorganisation of states based on language' again and again. Reorganization has already been done. Let us all accept it and stop fighting with each other.
Thirdly, since independence a lot of migration pf people from one state to another has happened. So there are Kannadigas in Maharashtra as there are Maharashtrians in Karnataka, there are lots of people from North India who are in Bangalore working in IT companies, similarly there would certainly be people in places like Delhi, Gurugaon and other places in North India who are from Bangalore. Imagine, if all these people(migrants) start demanding that a seperate state(based on the language they speak) be carved out of the state in which they live. It would be disastrous. India would then have some 500 states if these demands are met. The efforts of people like Sardar Valabhbhai Patel at integration of various princely states at the time of independence, would be undone. Not only that, we would then be fighting our own countrymen in this process and thereby weakening the unity of the country. Is it more important for us to fight amongst ourselves for a piece of land than all of us coexisting in harmony? Just think over.

Arjun Sharma said...

Dude, this Mahawiki is a zealot.